Starbucks

It occured to me the other day that I didn't often feel intimidated by society.  I mentioned this to my grandson as I was taking him out for a haircut.  I told him that for instance I could go into any bar anywhere in the world and order a drink even if I didn't know the language.  I knew how things worked and felt that I could fit in even if I looked funny.  The same did not apply to Starbucks, however.

Soon after, we were sitting in a unisex - or should I say gender neutral - hairdresser where he was having his haircut.  I had in my pocket my iPhone, I was reading a Kindle and at my side was a Starbucks coffee purchased on our way there.  I had almost arrived in the new society.  But there had been a major slip up on the way.

Oh, the horrors.  As I stood in line at the Starbucks behind a crowd of youngish people all staring intently at their cell phones, I realized that his was a place where I was out of my depth.  As I reached the head of the queue, I mumbled my order to the barrista. "A medium regular with a shot of vanilla, please."  I heard my grandson draw in his breath.  A major faux pas!  One does not use the term "medium" in Starbucks; the correct word is "grande!"  In one fell swoop I had blown my cover and declared myself an outsider, hopelessly out of date.  A bit like ordering a pint with a cherry in it!  It's so hard learning a new language at my age!