Citroen DS

One of the characters we see regularly on TV drives one of these - A Citroen DS circa 1975.

I only drove one twice (That's "two times" for the less eloquent of you!)  The first time was after a particularly liquid lunch in London with my two colleagues - we had been entertaining our bankers and it was a regular ritual.  Now here I suggest that those with a less than forgiving attitude to alcohol and the law may wish to stop reading as I have a confession to make which might upset you.  Back in the day, it was perfectly normal to go out to lunch and consume quite large quantities of booze and develop happy relationships.  It used to be enormous fun, and I don't regret it at all.  Anyway we rode up to town in this odd car, and I had a fancy to have a go with it.  It had a funny sort of suspension and a single arm holding the steering wheel.  I had no problems and we shot back to the inner suburbs where our office was located.
The next day as we were going out on another trip, I asked again to try it.  It was about 11 a.m. and naturally I was, as the saying goes, clean and sober!  I had a lot of trouble with this thing.  It felt really weird and moved around the road in all types of strange ways.  Which goes to show, if you decide to drive one you better be either French or seriously under the influence.  By the way, I never drive with any booze in me these days - I have S.W.M.B.O. do it!  Ha ha!